Negging Your Way to An HB's Heart 2.0

Chris, a twenty-year-old young man walks into a crowded Irish bar. He spots an attractive curvaceous blonde woman in her late twenties or early thirties. She is sitting on a bar stool next to a brunette girl, surrounded by three hunky guys. Any average man would not dare to approach the blonde femme in this intimidating scenario. Yet Chris has a secret weapon. He confidently approaches the group and says, “Hey did you guys see those two girls fighting outside the bar?” The group looks at him in awe. “No dude. That’s crazy! I wish I had,” says one of the hunky men. Chris has now entered the group and he is ready to start playing the game.

In 1995, Neil Strauss, writer and self-proclaimed pick-up artist, published his best-selling book “The Game,” in which he recounted his transformation from an awkward shy man, or an AFC (average frustrated chump), to a witty pick up artist by the name of Style.

In 2005, Strauss conducted a seminar for 43 guys who considered themselves “lost cases” in the art of seduction. According to Strauss, 34 of the men ended up with girlfriends. Furthermore, the group achieved a collective total of 53 one-night stands and two threesomes.

In the summer of 2006, Strauss led the Stylelife Challenge for 180 guys, in which the group accomplished 157 girlfriends, 274 one-night stands, and seven threesomes. Given the success of his seminars, in 2007, Strauss founded the Style Life Academy, the world’s first attraction-seduction school. Through this pick-up artist community, Style, along with other seduction experts, are able to educate AFC’s in the art of seduction and allegedly help them attract any "HB" (hot babe) they desire without blatantly hitting on her.

The Stylelife method sounds promising for many, improbable to others. The question is, how exactly does the Stylelife method work?

Serge Toppjian, 25, considers himself a devout follower of Stylelife, calling Strauss’ book The Game “the Bible.” Though he considers the book quite effective for him, he says, “It is not for everyone and not for every occasion.” Toppjian would disagree with those who claim Strauss’ methods have changed their lives. “[My seduction skills] did not improve much because I consider myself a natural,” Toppjian says. For him, attracting a woman is more about having faith in yourself than learning the methods of pick-up artists. “A pick-up artist’s most effective quality can be summarized in two words: con-fidence,” Toppjian adds.

The key into seducing a woman, Strauss writes in his book, is to “ignore the woman you desire while winning over her friends. If the target is attractive and used to men fawning all over her, the pick-up artist must intrigue her by pretending to be unaffected by her charm.” A man must resort to a “neg,” an accidental insult or backhanded compliment intended to lower a woman’s self-esteem.

According to “Evolve”, senior attraction-coach of the Stylelife Academy, “The Style life method helps women to realize for themselves they are attracted to you. This is what is called Flipping a Female’s Attraction Switch and that is totally opposed to you worshipping a woman and putting her on a pedestal to like you more. If someone bribes us and worships us to show their devotion we’re going to feel superior and disrespect them. Many times, we have a subconscious desire to reject them.” Evolve assures that the Stylelife method actually compels a woman to ask you to spend time with her.

Andrea Olguin, psychologist major at the American University of Paris says unpredictability is an important factor in attracting a woman. “A man who uses an unusual approach, which could manifest itself in the form of disinterest or rudeness, triggers a woman’s curiosity. Her disability to decipher him makes her perceive the man as a challenge and is automatically aroused,” Olguin says.

Does all of this sound too good to be true? How can a group of nerdy guys go from using computer game codes to codes of seduction? Do pick-up artists’ methods actually work? How does ignoring and “negging” capture a woman’s attention? I decided to take my friend Chris to a nearby Irish bar and have him perform the Stylelife method on a random target. After weeks of him reading the book and taking notes on Strauss’ techniques, he was ready to test his learning.

At the bar, I casually talk to a group of women and tell them about the Stylelife method. “If a guy talked to all of my friends and ignores me, I would be annoyed, but I would be intrigued. I would want his attention just for the sake of getting his attention,” says Karen Ferguson, 32.

Yet when Chris, tries this method on a blonde attractive woman, things do not look so bright for him. The minute he starts “negging her” by ignoring her and telling one of the hunky guys how loud she is after she tries to join the conversation, she gives him an irritated look, whispers something to her girlfriend and the two girls leave to the bathroom. A couple of minutes later, the girls are out of the bathroom and the three hunky guys have made their away towards them- far, far away from Chris. It would be safe to say that Chris has epically failed.

People are desperate to find a manual to the game of love. Many former AFC’s who are now self-proclaimed PUA’s (pick up artists) of the Stylelife Academy claim they have. Yet many, who like Chris, have invested their time and money in seduction coaching and have been utterly unsuccessful, have nothing but feelings of animosity against Strauss. “I thought some of the methods in his book were flat out ridiculous, but I trusted the dude. He seemed real. Now I’m walking home alone feeling like the biggest creep on Earth,” says Chris.

After two rum and cokes he seems to get over it. He meets his friends who arrive for moral support and they depart to another bar in search of cute college girls. This time, he will use a more conventional approach: offer a girl a drink and give her a few corny compliments. Negging her is not an option.

An Oasis for Writers

Technology finally answered my prayers. FastPencil is a new self-publishing site that allows writers to publish and get immediate feedback for their work. A recent blog in the NY Times discusses the benefits of this new technology.

Publishing has become increasingly easier with the rise of technology. This obviously denotes an increased competition for writers. Yet, I am particularly pleased with the networking aspect of emerging sites for writers. In FastPencil, you can add reviewers and editors to your book project (yes you can upload an entire book) which truly facilitates a writer's career. As soon as I read about this site, I immediately opened myself an account. Of course, one cannot expect to become immediately rich and successful in the writing world, even with the rise of technology, but its significant aid is undeniable!

The Fate of Sudan

This Sunday, Sudan will experience a major historic and political event. For the first time since 1986 the country will undergo multi-party national elections. Sudan's president, Omar Hassan al-Bashir, who has been held responsible for several crimes in the Darfur conflict, has stated that he will respect the results of the election, yet many groups such as Sudan People's Liberation Movement have threatened to boycott the elections due to its corrupt nature. Yet these elections undoubtedly mark a significant step in Sudanese people's involvement in the governing of their country.

Today, I read an article in the New York Times about the more than 300 Darfur immigrants that are now residing in Kensington, Brooklyn. One cannot help immediately relating Sudan to the war in Darfur. To be honest, it is all that comes up to me when I think about this country. It is difficult to not see the country in a political light, especially with the ongoing elections. Yet, I think we should start regarding Sudan as a community, as a culture, as a society that is progressing in protecting and enforcing human rights. Naturally, the country has a long road ahead. Sudan is rich in natural resources such as unproven minerals and oil reserves, yet it is up to its government to promote an equitable progress.

Ignorance Is Bliss?

“If I’m not going to like it, I don’t want to hear it.” I have repeatedly told this phrase to my friend Bianca, also known as “the bearer of bad news”, yet she continues to tell me things I genuinely do not want to know. A few days ago, at one of our weekly get-togethers at her apartment, she casually informed me that my kindergarten boyfriend, the love of my life at that time, kissed half the girls in our class while he was with me. Needless to say, I absolutely did not want to know this. Why would she ruin my perfect childhood romance by revealing that my beloved was a little Casanova? I would have rather lived happily in my ignorance with my false, yet perfect, image of my first love. That brings me to the question, is not-knowing, as a rule of thumb, better than knowing?

Are less intelligent people happier than more intelligent ones? Since intelligence is a fairly subjective matter, for practical reasons, let us refer to it in terms of knowledge.

The General Social Survey asks a certain group of individuals about happiness and tells them to complete a basic vocabulary test as a measure of intelligence. The people are divided into top, middle, and bottom categories according to their levels of intelligence. The survey showed no significant discrepancy in the happiness of the top, middle, and bottom categories. Nevertheless, when it came to unhappiness, only 8% of the top and middle sections claimed to be unhappy, while 14% in the bottom third declared themselves as unhappy.

In our modern era where capitalism rules the world, one would logically assume that intelligent people are happier. Brains get you higher-paying jobs and money brings you happiness; simple as that. The successful corporate lawyer, who graduated from Harvard, surely appears to be more content with his life than the unemployed fellow who was not smart enough to even get into college.

It is not a challenge to conclude that knowledge, when involving one’s degree of intelligence, leads to success and, therefore, happiness. Yet, when it comes to non-intellectual knowledge, can we arrive to the same conclusion? My friend Bianca did me no favor by telling me my kindergarten boyfriend was outrageously unfaithful to me. When I found this out, my life was not positively affected. If anything, it was negatively affected. I was happier not knowing of my lover’s infidelities. My ignorance certainly did not hurt me in any way. Here, I can affirm that my ignorance was, indeed, bliss. Yet I cannot make a generalization based on my trivial situation.

For the most part, in exception to my mild heartbreak, ignorance does not lead to bliss. Think about it this way: success brings happiness and success without knowledge is practically unfeasible. Great things cannot be accomplished by living in the darkness. Of course there will always be instances in which we are better off being ignorant. I myself have agreed to this by posing the example of my adulterous childhood boyfriend. As Anatole France said, “A person is never happy except at the price of some ignorance.” Evidently it is up to one’s judgment to decide when to opt for ignorance and when to opt for knowledge. Yet, as rational individuals, in most life situations, we are aware of when we are being ignorant- we are aware that there is a reality out there that we have not yet been exposed to. Sooner than later, we are bound to be awakened to such reality and the longer we have lived in a perfect lie, the cruder our awakening will be. A happy fool is only happy for so long.

Little Felons

Have you ever heard such a thing as a jail-themed playground? As a kid and early teenager, who loved playing cops and robbers, I would've been thrilled by such a playground. I remember feeling eager before going to my school's carnival and playing at the jail booth, where you could pay tickets and have your friends be arrested. Who said childish games are not morbid?

An article in the NY Times addressed the recent criticism a playground at the Tompkins Houses development in Bedford-Stuyvesent received jail-themed bars and cell door. Upon Black and Brown News' article criticizing the park's theme, the New York City Housing Authority removed the park's jail sign and bars.

According to Susan Solomon, author of American Playgrounds, believes playground equipment should be more abstract in order to promote children's creativity. " “A jail may be sort of extreme, but it’s really I think representative of the fact that too often, the playground manufacturers and the people who are commissioning them are thinking too literally, and they’re not looking at how much abstraction really benefits kids.” I definitely think she presents a valid point. Though jail, castle, and jungle themed playgrounds may be fun to children, a more beneficial altrenative would be to create less literal playgrounds and let children play with their imagination. This too, would eliminate the hassle of unintentionally creating inappropriate-themed playgrounds.

NYU Village

It is impossible to walk around Greenwich Village and not feel the overpowering presence of NYU. Not only are their buildings everywhere, but NYU is publicized in restaurants, supermarkets, and local stores that offer discounts to all their students. As a New School student, it is difficult not to feel insignificant in comparison, hence their animosity towards NYU.

This week I read an article in the NY Times about NYU's expansion plans for the future. The institution plans to grow 40% in size over the next 20 years, which denotes to an additional 6 million square feet. To compensate for their massive occupation of the village, the university has announced that it will donate one of its future buildings for the opening of an elementary school. Scott Stringer, Manhattan's borough president, perceives this as a genuine contribution to Greenwich Village families.

NYU's expansion plans are quite overwhelming for Greenwich Village residents. I find it understandable for the inhabitants of this residential area to feel bothered by their neighborhood becoming increasingly invaded by college dormitories. Even the report issued by the Manhattan borough president perceived the university's expansion plans as problematic. Nevertheless, their move to give back to the community by enabling the opening of a new school, in an area where schools are overcrowded, was an undoubtedly good move. This proposal earned them Stringer's acclamation and will most likely earn them some points with the Village residents.

2. A Melancholic Movie Ending

One spring morning seven years ago, 25 year old California-native John Bullock was walking around the highly populated and commercial West Village when all of a sudden he had a vision: he was going to open his own video store in this neighborhood. His goal was to combine his passion for movies and his desire to succeed in the city into one new and exciting business.

Two years later Bullock opened Cinema Classics, a small video store on Perry Street and 7th Avenue South, which offers the best classic movies of all times. “There are many movie aficionados in the Village area, so the store was quite a hit during its first couple of years,” Bullock says. Bullock, a movie aficionado himself, would spend hours talking to customers about his favorite directors such as Stanley Kubrick, Franz Capra, and Gus Van Sant.

Yet the current economic crisis, the intense competition with more economical movie services, such as Netflix and On Demand, and the ongoing movie piracy industry, have all taken a toll in Bullock’s industry. After a severe decline in the store’s customer rate that accounted to an approximate 40% drop in its sales, the store can no longer afford its $5000 a month retail space in the West Village. It is programmed to close this upcoming April. “Now a days watching a movie in the Internet is about the easiest thing in the world. It’s impressive how far piracy has gone,” Bullock says.

Victor Lewis, one of Cinema Classic’s old customers says about the store, “The actual selection of movies is solid if not out of this world. The problem with the store I feel is that it'll go out of business because there's too much competition around.”

Not only are the small businesses suffering from the economic crisis. A decline in the economy’s rate of profit taking place since the 1950’s seems to be affecting all businesses. Last year, the closing of the Virgin Megastores marked a significant turning point in the music and movie industries. The store’s revenue declined from $230 million in 2002 to $170 million in 2009.

Free online movie sites have become increasingly popular in the past couple of years. Websites such as Watch-Movies, Project Free TV, and even YouTube provide a vast database of both vintage and contemporary movies that viewers can watch without the need of downloading, spending money, or leaving their homes. According to the Motion Pictures Association of America (MCAA), 18% of online users in the US have illegally watched a full-length movie. When asked if he watches movies on illegal Internet sites, Terrell Smith, movie fan and New School student says, “Yes. I’d rather not spend the money, but also because they’re readily available on the Internet and I don’t think the people who watch the content are at fault, but the ones who upload it are the ones doing the disservices to the movie industry.” When asked the same questions, most students had similar reactions. Many perceived the movie industry as being overly rich and not truly suffering from online movie piracy.

Yet for small executive John Bullock, the illegal competition cost him his business. The average $20 sale price of the DVD’s in Cinema Classics cannot compete with the free illegal movie databases online. Bullock is reluctant about getting into details about his future career plans, yet he does plan to continue to offer the movies he has in stock through the store’s website. “I’ve made a good income doing what I do best for many years. It is now time for Cinema Classics to take a different path,” Bullock says. Above all, the hopeful owner refuses to believe that this will be the end of his esteemed company.